This is your final warning. Leave now, do not proceed, the following ideas are subversive, I will not be held responsible for your actions, if you decide to continue you will read the thoughts of a blogger, a blasphemer.
Do you not know that blogging about books is forbidden? It is terrible, disgusting, stupid, unholy. I do not have the right, nay, the AUTHORITY, to write about books. That may only be done by The Literary Critic. It is only He/She that may express thoughts or critique literature. I may read books and maybe even talk about them, though I’m not sure on the talking bit, haven’t yet cleared that with The Literary Critic. He/She hasn’t replied to the comment I left on His/Her blog. That sort of thing is beneath Him/Her. There is to be no dialogue only monologue, instructions on what to think and what to read, what to enjoy and what is trash.
By putting one word to paper or website I am breaking the rules, rules handed down through generations from The First, The Great Literary Critic.
Thou shalt review books only if thou art ordained from on high.
Do not think about what you have read, your thoughts have already been decreed, written in the hallowed pages of newspapers and magazines. If you wish to know what you think of a book find the appropriate review. This may cause confusion because The Literary Critic tends to be ambiguous. No matter, remember your place, do not ask questions. Merely sit quietly and receive.
Most importantly, please do not review or blog about books. We must protect The Literary Critic. The Literary Critic is concerned only with perserving His/Her AUTHORITY. Not protecting the importance of literature. Not encouraging more people to read, to find the next great novel. He/She is only concerned with protecting the importance of Literary Criticism.
Remember, you have been warned.